Hayden AI Introduces Laser Lanes

April 1, 2024 will go down as a turning point in transportation history: Today we’re launching Laser Lanes, a game-changing new product that will allow transit agencies to relocate illegally parked vehicles blocking bike lanes, bus stops, and bus lanes into legal parking spots, or the shadow dimension, with the power of lasers.

“There is strong customer demand for Laser Lanes,” said Chris Carson, CEO and founder of Hayden AI. “After testing, only a handful of vehicles re-appeared more than five miles away from where they were lasered. The next part is figuring out how to reorganize the atoms back into the shape of the car.”

Laser Lanes utilizes Hayden AI’s mobile perception platform and a (patent pending) bus-mounted gamma beam laser emitter. The technology is designed to improve road safety for cyclists, transit riders, and pedestrians as well as significantly improve on-time bus performance by laser-beaming obstructions out of dedicated transit and bike zones.

“My XL SUV was laser-beamed out of the bike lane yesterday, and you know what, I actually thought it was kind of cool,” said a vehicle owner following Hayden AI’s initial deployment of Laser Lanes. “At first I was like, where is my giant car? I remembered parking it in the bike lane because a bunch of bike riders gave me the finger. But when I heard about Laser Lanes, I looked around and found a shape resembling my car in a legal parking spot.”

Laser Lanes is available as a beta deployment to all transit agencies currently using Hayden AI’s vision AI platform for automated bus lane, bus stop, and bike lane enforcement. Hayden AI is not liable for any transit- or bike-blocking vehicles reduced to mush.